Poor Fifi. This is not a happy dog. |
Today’s topic is disgraced animals.
Exhibit 1 is Fifi, the shamed dog in this week’s bad
postcard.
The back reads: “Fifi, MARINELAND OF FLORIDA’S canine
mascot, enjoys a ride around a porpoise-powered surfboard. Marine is located 18
miles south of St. Augustine on scenic A1A.”
Well, we learned that a porpoise is involved. That means
there are two disgraced animals here.
It’s bad enough that Fifi is thrown on a board that isn’t
really a surfboard and dragged around a pool for the amusement of Floridians
and tourists by a sea-mammal that had the good sense to stay out of the frame.
No, the problem here is the tutu. Dog’s don’t wear them.
Actually, only a rather limited population of humans wears them because it’s
just a tough look to pull off. Fifi can’t do it. She’s probably hoping the
matching accessory will draw attention from the tutu, but it’s just not
working.
About the best thing we can do here is look away and hope a
compassionate porpoise tows Fifi into the orca tank where she can be put out of
here misery is one bite, maybe two.
Now, let’s talk about an animal with a similar skill who
circles the pool with dignity intact. I’m talking about Twiggy, thewater-skiing squirrel.
I've seen Twiggy. He appeared at the Grand Rapids Boat Show
years ago. I spoke to his trainers, who are nice people.
Chuck and Lou Ann Best – also from
Florida – found an orphaned squirrel after a hurricane and raised him as a
family pet. The friendly squirrel used to ride around on their shoulders, even
in the pool.
According to Twiggly lore,
Chuck constructed a little water ski platform and hooked it up to a remote
controlled boat, and Twiggy soon learned how to hitch a ride.
A video of these squirrelly
adventures made it to a television show, and next thing we know Twiggy and
several squirrels with similar skills are bringing smiles to boat show
attendees across the country.
I got to meet Mrs. Best and see
Twiggy in action. It was very cool.
You ask about the difference
between disgraced Fifi and talented Twiggy? Twiggy doesn't wear a tutu. He wears a cool little life vest.
Smart animals know that safety comes before
style.
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